Monday, March 16, 2009

A New Acronym: HRDB

This weekend I went out on a long ride and encountered an HRDB - Harley Riding Douchebag.

At a gas station in Wickenburg, AZ, I parked next to the HRDB and turned to say howdy. Before I could even open my mouth he asked, in a sarcastic tone, "How do you ride that thing?"

I replied with the only honest answer - "Hard and Fast." I was tempted to add, "the same way I ride your old lady," but he looked like the kind of guy who would push my bike over and run away once I had my back turned. Besides, his old lady was right there.

Anyway, I went about my business in the gas station, and came back out to get rolling again. I attempted to make some more conversation with the guy, but it was pretty pointless.

As I was getting my helmet back on, a minivan pulled up and an attractive woman in shorts got out of the back. Once he was done panting and grunting at her, he actually turned around to his lady companion and said "Did you see that?"

Well, all that assholery must have gotten him charged up for more riding, so he hopped on his hawg and fired it up.

And by fired it up, I mean, started and revved the motor WAY up, so his stupid-loud pipes made everybody's ears hurt.

Especially the poor bastards inside the gas station, since his exhaust was pointed straight in the open door.

Harley Riding Douchebag.

I know there are non-douchebag Harley riders. I know there are douchebags without Harleys. But somehow, the combination of the two becomes extra offensive.

Hence, HRDB.